10.09.02 :: Freaks and Geeks
The opinions in this letters column aren't necessarily those of Jeanne Rubbo, owner of videogamerecaps.com. Even so, Jeanne owns *us* and has locked us in a dark closet with Tidus and Rinoa until we think of something funny. HELP! In the meantime, send in your comments, queries, whining, flames, spam, opinions, facts, opinions that you think are facts, and general idiocy to firstname.lastname@example.org
Welcome back, ladies and gents, to the VGR Mailbag! This week's topic is one of our favorites: bashing fanboys. And apparently, it's one of yours, too. We received some truly fabulous (and lengthy) letters this week, assessing in interesting ways just what makes the fanboy (Homo virginius) so goddamn annoying. Is it the lack of fellow human beings in his parents' basement, or is it something deeper, more universal? Without further ado, let's get this show on the road!
|Fanboys for every hobby...God help us.
Dear Mistresses of the Mailbag:
Please don't flatter yourself into thinking that the mailbag or Jeanne's site or the gaming hobby attracts all the weirdos. Every hobby I know of attracts fans (which is short for "fanatic," by the way - and explains a lot!). I know of one perfectly normal lady who is into stamping. She spends a small fortune buying rubber stamps. She makes her own greeting cards (and does a nice job, too) but also attends meetings, subscribes to newsletters, etc. She seems a regular sort of person until you go into her hobby room, which is better equipped than any stamping supply store I've ever seen.
Personally, I am into model railroading, and THERE is a hobby that attracts nutcases by the thousands! You get these cement heads who defend their scale or gauge as the only one worth bothering with and even get into shouting matches about it. You get the Royal Nitpickers who will tear apart your scratch-built locomotive and tell you the rivits are the wrong size or the wrong distance apart. I know of one fellow who runs down to the depot to photograph every train that goes through town. He has thousands of photos! I am afraid I crushed his ego, though, the last time he tried to engage my enthusiasm. I told it had have a steam whistle attached to it to get my interest, as far as I am concerned, a diesel is just a box on wheels. I won't tell you about the locomotive engineer I knew who actually went and had a sex change. Just watch who you try to hit on at model railroad conventions. Worse yet, I've met this True Fan who thinks he is a fountain of information and cannot wait to share it. Somehow he only calls when I'm on the toilet.... or a half hour after I've gone to bed. I plan to drive a railroad spike into his heart. This doofus is a lot like some of the Young Star Trek "fans" I've encountered. The type who are too young to have actually seen the original series when it was new, and yet spout off during the movie as if they know all about it and all their information is a wrong as that "Truth.com" review of FFX except that they aren't being stupid to be funny. As for gaming, I think that because it is a hobby that is usually done alone - few of us are lucky enough to meet gals like Jeanne, Auron's Girl and Lita-chan who share our enthusiasm for our hobby. And since we're spending our few hours of free time at home playing "Fantasy Forest XXII" instead of going out and about meeting people, we're not likely to have a large circle of pals to chat with about gaming. I envy those of you in a college town with a game club or an anime club. So it is only natural that you would attract a lot of sorry loners who bug the sheepdip out of you with annoying messages, complaints, etc. Sure glad I'm not among that sad lot of losers.... oh wait..... I am..... dammit!
Now, now, CS, there's nothing wrong with young Star Trek fans. I was once one myself, and a Data fangirl to boot. (Okay, so I'm still a Data fangirl.) But you're absolutely right, there's such a thing as taking your hobbies to extremes. Like that poor deluded woman in Arkansas who insists that everyone call her "Commander" instead of her given name, and went to court because she wanted to wear her ST:TNG uniform at her job in the copy shop, claiming it was a "military uniform". I remember sitting on my living room floor, howling with laughter when that part of "Trekkies" was playing, it just seemed too bizarre to be true. It wasn't the cosplay in and of itself that was the issue, but her obsession to actually be this fictional crew member at all times. And you know, the sad thing is that even if she did manage to warp herself into a ST:TNG episode, she'd only end up as the sixth crewmember on the Away Team, and we all know what happens to those poor sods. But your contempt for the younger fans is almost fanboy-ish in its leanings, so do take care that you don't cross that line. Just remember that William Shatner skit on SNL back in the early '90's. It was the only role the man ever had where he actually got it right. You can apply it to pretty much any hobby, be it stamping, model railroading, or *twitch * amateur country music bands.
As for the argument that we game loving girls are somehow a rarity, I think it's a fallacy. As my own beloved HG likes to say, "Want your girl to game? Hand her the controller." And no one should ever use their gaming as an excuse as to why they can't meet someone. You have to go to the grocery store, the gas station, the bookstore sometime. The best come on line ever made was "Hi" and a nice smile. Even the shyest of us can manage that. Hey, it worked for me.
Your point is well taken--gaming is certainly not the only thing that brings the freaks out of the woodwork. As for envying those of us with access to an anime club (no game club here, I don't think), don't. I can assure you that loser fanboy assholes that belong to an anime club are, most of the time, still loser fanboy assholes. I've made a couple friends via the anime club...and I've encountered an equal amount of people that make me think homicide isn't as big a deal as the legal system would like us to believe. Somehow, these people become even MORE obnoxious in person. Maybe it's a spot reaction: they're so excited to FINALLY meet someone who shares their interests that they immediately start spouting off every obscure anime they've ever seen in hopes that they'll look amazingly awesome to the obvious newbie peon they're talking to. A sample conversation:
Fanboy: So you like Utena? I've seen the whole series.
Me: So have I.
Me: Me too.
Fanboy: *turning red* Well, I've read the manga.
Me: Same here!
Fanboy: YOU COULDN'T HAVE READ THE MANGA! IT HASN'T BEEN TRANSLATED INTO ENGLISH YET!!!
Me: If you've read it in Japanese, is there some reason I couldn't have?
Fanboy: I'M A JAPANESE MINOR!
Me: Wow, me too!
Fanboy: *head explodes*
I think I'll take up mousepad-decorating. Surely THAT hobby doesn't have any fanboys, right? RIGHT?!
|Don't forget to bring a towel
Freaky Fanboys? Fangirls, too?
I think that this letter falls under this, so why don't I just shut up and tell you?
At a certain site I go to, there's a "Console Wars" forum. It is the most hilarious thing I've ever seen. All of the console fanboys posts there just to get a rise out of the other fanboys. Whenever I go in, I'm never disappointed by the "Gamecube sucks!" or "X-sux" threads. They argue on the most idiotic points, like X system has more hits and Y system has more awesome games coming out later. Once, I posted in the forum to see what kind of reaction I would get. My post said: "I don't care what you say, the winner of the console wars will be..." Guess what I said on the inside? You guessed it: The Okama Gamesphere! Even they had to laugh. What do you two think about the bally-hooed wars?
RPG, dear, help me out here. Are you professing to have bested the fanboys, or are you confessing that you are one? Not everyone knows what the Okama Gamesphere is, you know. It would be like me mentioning the Brain Dream system. (Which comes from an episode of Cowboy Bebop named "Brain Scratch" for those interested.) As for the console wars, they've always gone on. Once it was Atari vs. Intellivision, then it became Atari vs. Nintendo, then Nintendo vs. Sega and not long after Sony joined the fray. Whoever is able to get a grip on the better titles and marketing ploy usually comes out all right. Now that's not to say that the other systems didn't offer great games, you can name just about any system and there's at least one "classic" game for it. And companies don't always have the same market share in mind, as you can see with Nintendo and Sony these days. So, quite honestly, the "wars" don't bother me too much. If I want to play a game badly enough, I'll get the system for it - eventually. But the X-box is still too damned big. You almost need a frickin' moving van for that monster.
I'd like to point out another sort of fanboy that we haven't discussed yet: the Simpsons/South Park fanboys. These people are recognizable in one simple way: quoting. The dutiful Simpsons fanboy/girl will work no fewer than ten Simpsons quotes into their daily conversations with others. One of these will always be "Eeeeeeeeeexcellent." The same rule applies to the South Park faithful, with their requisite daily quote being "Screw you guys, I'm going home." A combination of these two types of fanboys (and there are a LOT of them) is a scary thing indeed. Help me, Jeebus!
As for the console wars...I don't care. Indirectly, I have every console, so there's no point in bitching about what games come out for which system. That's right. Even the XBox.
|Five levels of fanboyism
Only one of you probably has any idea of who I am, but I was perusing the site and couldn't resist the mailbag topic. Being an anime fan, a video game fan, and a role player, (the real kind, with paper and dice) I've met my share of fanboys.
But you probably don't care so go ahead and skip this boring introduction. But wait, you've already read it.... SUCKER.
Fanboy #1: The fanboy who takes things too seriously
These are the least obnoxious fanboys, unless you rile them. These are sad little people who for some reason identify their entire existence with a HOBBY. You know the type, always wearing some anime or video game shirt or a shirt with some band you haven't heard of in some vain attempt to proclaim to the world "LOOK AT ME, I LIKE THIS STUFF, I THEREFORE RULE." These guys are only obnoxious if you talk to them. This is because 1. they can't help but bring up the obsession in question no matter how little you care about it and 2. if you try to talk to them about
their hobby itself they seem compelled to dress you down with the most obscure topic they can think of trying to prove that their knowledge vastly exceeds your own. So in short, just leave them alone.
Fanboy #2: The self-pitier
These are the guys that just don't understand why people (usually girls) don't like them. "Why don't girls like me, I'm a nice guy, why won't she just go out with me to make me feel better?" Ahem..... YOU ARE A PUSSY. IF I ACTED LIKE THAT I WOULD KICK MY OWN ASS. These Zima-drinking little toads are convinced that their problems are the rest of the world's fault and can never stop whining enough to think that THEY ARE THE DEFECTIVE ONE. They must be silenced. With extreme prejudice.
Fanboy #3: Assholes
These are related to #1 but also feel that their fandom gives them some level of intelligence and superiority over everyone else. These kids probably complained about jocks all through high school but secretly wished they were the ones
getting drunk and screwing cheerleaders. The moral of the story: An asshole who thinks he's smarter than everyone else instead of thinking he's tougher than everyone else IS STILL AN ASSHOLE.
Fanboy #4: The fanboy meets a girl
It's a sad, sad thing to see a girl looking at anime. As soon as some reasonably attractive girl goes to the anime, video game or manga shelf, she is suddenly surrounded with nerds who think if they can impress the poor girl with obscure
knowledge and berate her for liking girly crap like Sailor Moon, maybe, just maybe, they can kiss her and touch her boobies. First of all, NO ONE CARES HOW MUCH YOU KNOW ABOUT STUPID EVANGELION. Second of all, GIRLS LIKE GIRLY CRAP LIKE SAILOR MOON, MORON, and trying to convince them otherwise just makes you #3.
Fanboy #5: Evangelion Fans
Evangelion. Is. Stupid. Period. For some reason, however, droves of fanboys seemed to convinced otherwise. Ok, first of all, THE ROBOTS HAVE EXTENSION CORDS. Let me repeat that THE STUPID ROBOTS HAVE EXTENSION CORDS. Well, at least Tokyo's safe, but lord knows, New York just doesn't have a big enough wall socket, so if the Angels attack there....... KABOOM. The characters are obnoxious. If I wanted to see a bunch of depressed junior high kids I'd turn on the neighbor kids' MTV. And the last two episodes. MAKING A MOVIE TO FINISH THE SERIES IS NOT HOW CIVILIZED PEOPLE DO THINGS. The animators were finishing the TV series and realized they only had $50 left to do the last two episodes, and they needed $25 for beer. So they got drunk and threw together some crap. A crappy ending for a crappy show. But I guess that's just my opinion, but I'm entitled SO SOD OFF.
Destroyer of Worlds
Devourer of Muffins
I may as well just stop responding to the letters now, because this one sums up my opinions on the subject at hand so well, it's like I wrote it. Except it's funny. Very well done, honey.
"Elmundo" here (and if it's not completely obvious who this person is, AG will spell it out for you in a second) did leave out a very important fanboy category, however. Fanboy #6: The extremely bitter and hateful fan who is convinced everything sucks except their one chosen love. Of course, this ties into #1, #3 and especially #5. "How dare ANYONE create another anime series! There's no WAY it'll be better than Evangelion! I think I'll go sit in the corner and masturbate to my Asuka x Misato x Rei hentai doujinshi now!"
I can personally attest to the horror of Fanboy #4, but from a slightly different perspective. I swear to God, the next idiot fanboy who approaches me in Sam Goody and asks me why I'm looking at Sailor Moon DVDs instead of the entire WALL devoted to DRAGONBALL Z, THE BESTEST SERIES EVAR!!!? is going to get kicked in the balls. Which would probably be the only contact said fanboy has ever had or will ever have between a female and his balls. Moron.
So, Josh, I suppose the next package I send out to the beautiful and talented LC had better contain some muffins, huh? Oh, dear, I've blown your cover. Whoops. In any case, I think you've managed to subcategorize our video game/anime fanboy species quite nicely. I bow to you, my dear. I'd like to add a subset to category #3, and that's the "games as art" fanboys. Most of the time, these little wankers are so convinced of their superiority and their belief in their pseudo-erudite opinions that they can't imagine anyone thinking differently. In fact, anyone who does think differently is just threatened by our fanboy's greater knowledge and opinions and on a crusade to "get" them. Usually these types are also convinced that 16-bit games are the most wonderful form of gaming EVAR, and that anyone who's gone past that is just a commercialized sell-out. Because everyone knows that game companies weren't out to make money back then, it was all about the art! Oh, and should one of these little assholes make their way to a gaming message board, every single post in a topic applies to them by default. Because they're assholes.
It's funny you should mention pencil and paper RPGs, since that particular pastime seems to attract more than its share of obsessive fanboys. I know people who carry their character dossier around like the Holy Grail, Yevon help you if you aren't suitably impressed with their often-manipulated stats. And forget your peace of mind if someone should happen to bring up a debate on the much maligned "Say it, play it" rules! Since I'm basically lazy, I much prefer SIPI rules myself. Honestly, why should you have to roll a d6 just to see if you can go to the bathroom? Oh, yes, I forgot. This isn't really just a fun pastime, it's an art form. Now hand me the @#$% toilet paper, Sturm Brightblade, Amazing Merchant of Really Painful Arm Noogies. And close your eyes, you little perv.
|I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Tidusy kid
Hello there, not-quite-freaky fangirls.
What dost a freaky fan make? This question, made by Mrs. Rubbo on the previous mailbag, made me ponder for quite a bit. After some cavillating, I realized that I was using big words just to make myself look like the serious person I am far from being. That's when the answer hit me.
You see, our pastimes of choice, be they videogames, animation, comics (oops, I mean "graphic novels") or even wrestling, have generally been a part of us since our childhood. So whenever one indulges in the pastime of choice, one might get in contact with his/her inner child at times.
Sometimes the inner child reminds us of how fun our hobbies can be, and as a result we get some of the nicer breed of fans, the ones who make well-designed webpages about their pastime, and occassionally get others like them to help out at some ancillary projects (like a mailbag, or a contest).
However, sometimes the inner child is no charming, wonder-struck little scamp, but a wanky little brat. This brat tells some fans that, no matter what anyone says, they are The Law: they can state their opinions as undisputable fact, write themselves into stories as the epitome of perfection, rant and rave about the most trivial of things, and other stuff
that makes the general public regard us as the lowest of scum. And yet, how the general public perceives us makes the brat wank some more, until the nice kids stop being nice and beat the wanker up.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm due for a beating elsewhere. Fun stuff.
Oh dear, QF. Hope they didn't hurt you too badly. Or steal your lunch money. A growing boy needs his PB&J and Capri-Sun. You bring up some good points. Most of us have been involved in our hobbies a long time. But that only leads to another weapon in the fanboy arsenal. As the lovely and talented Mrs. Rubbo herself has said in the past, there are that breed of fanboys and girls who are out to prove just how H4RDC0R3 they really are by constantly one-upping others. Take video games for example. Let's say your first RPG was FFVII. No shame in that is there? It could be that's just when you got interested in video games in general or became old enough to play. Maybe it was your first PSX game. Mention that to a |337 fanboy and you're apt to get "Oh, yeah? Well, MY first RPG was FFIV!" to which another bitter fanboy will sneer "Yeah? Well MY first RPG was FFI - in Japanese! I imported it and bought a Japanese system just to play it!" You get the idea.
Anime fanfolks are just as bad. If you don't know EVERYTHING about EVERY SINGLE ANIME IN EXISTENCE, you're a philistine poser. Folks, sometimes a cartoon is just a cartoon. And we all know of cartoons that suck. In short, kids, it's fine to let your inner child come out and play. The world would be a mighty dull place if we didn't. But make sure that said inner child is better behaved than the trailer-trash hellspawn cursing my fair Mulletland, okay? I'm not exactly known for my patience - or a liking for children.
Jeebus, QF, your letter explains SO MUCH. How creepy that all of this relates to fanboys being Mini-Tiduses on the inside. "You don't like Evangelion?! GET OUTTA MY TOWN!"
Sorry. Couldn't resist.
|Wankery loves company
What came first -- the wanker or the game? Short answer: both and neither.
First of all, why are scary obsessive types so attracted to games? The most obvious answer is that games are a way for a fanboy to become a super strong, hot (in some cases) hero who saves the world, rather than a socially inept slacker. It's a lot more fun to stab monsters than it is to do homework or to take out the garbage. But games are also a way for fanboys and fangirls to be "elite" and "special" because there aren't as many people who play games, as opposed to people who, say, play or watch sports. People who already suffer from low self-esteem will latch onto anything to make themselves feel special, even if said thing is "I'M THE #1 FAN OF [whatever game or character] EVER!!!!!"
I will offer the unpopular opinion that games can also cause fanboys to be even more out of touch with reality. No one wants to believe that playing video games can cause any harm whatsoever, and in a way they're right -- games aren't going to make you go out and kill people. However, I've seen WAY too many fanboys who expect all women to look like Tifa, or to be blindly accepting like Rinoa. I've actually read a post from a dude that said "I wish I could have a girlfriend that would love me no matter how shittily I treated her -- just like Rinoa loved Squall." Clearly, something is amiss here.
I am going to bring up yet another cause of intense fanboy/fangirl scariness: other fanboys and fangirls. Say you're a maladjusted wanker and no one understands you at all, even though you have a heart of gold. You sign on to the internet one day, and what do you find? Ten million wankers just like you! If I had a dollar for every shy but halfway decent person who turned into an obnoxious loser because of time spent on gaming message boards with morons, I'd be a rich woman indeed.
Of course it is possible to be a gamer -- even an "obsessed" gamer -- without losing touch with reality and ending up talking incessantly about your Tifa crush, or telling random people how you've written 57 chapters of a fanfic where Squall gets raped, or -- God forbid -- dressing up as videogame characters. .......Wait, scratch that last one.
But Jeanne, I am the number one fan of Au - er, point taken. I'm sure that out there somewhere is a huge 2MB animated sig on a message board proclaiming "AuronLuvver69"'s great passion to the world, along with a link to the fan shrine, and her Auron themed online blog. (No, not mine, stop looking at me like that!)
It does seem that many intelligent, shy people are drawn to video games. And sometimes, it does appear that some simply get lost. Maybe it's because you've found that great message board or local group devoted to one day making your own games, or just discussing games. And when you join, most everyone's nice to you at the start. Finally, a place to belong! Then it all goes wrong. Now that you're in the group, you're flaming people for a "hi" post, when you made a "hi" post not too long ago, or mocking people in the local game store because they like sports games. And you know what? Your favorite game isn't among the favorite list of your new friends because it isn't a Japanese title. So, to belong better with them, you toss Ol' Faithful Game aside for something new with no English overdub and no English text. But hey! Your friends all like the game, so it's GOT to be a great game right? And the hot girl in your class who thinks you're a snot-nosed geek is the Goddess of All, but the girl you met in the game store, who might just share your interest is a fat cow because she doesn't look like Rinoa or Tifa. And what's more, your friends say they wouldn't date her, even if they wanted to have a girlfriend - which they don't, since girls can't understand how deep a game like Dragoon Soldier 4.7 really is. It starts a vicious cycle that's hard to break. Yes, you've become a fanboy and the bane of most gamer's existence. But there is help. Admitting that you have a problem is the first step. Being beaten over the head repeatedly by yours truly is the second step.
I wanted to talk about your point that the more obsessive gamers lose touch with the real world. Absolutely right, firing your 1337-@$$ shotgun in Goldeneye 007 is NOT going to make you say, "Gee, that was fun! I think I'll go find a shotgun and explode my teacher! 3y3 15 haRdC0r3!!!111" What games can do to the weak-minded (hey, that's a Star Wars reference, WORSHIP ME!!!) is cause them to judge their REAL surroundings by videogame standards. You mentioned guys thinking all girls should be buxom like Tifa and passive (in a way) like Rinoa, but it goes even deeper than that. Videogame plots often offer the theme that Love Conquers All. That everything is okay if you have somebody to love. (See: Every Game Arts Game Ever Made, EVER.) So the single, depressed fanboy gets it in his head that all of his problems--his dependence on his parents, his lack of drive in life, his overall loserness--will magically vanish if only he can find that doormat, er, girl with D-cup boobs. Guess what? Having a girlfriend WILL NOT SOLVE ALL YOUR PROBLEMS. If only life were as simple as Rinoa.
|Some call Him Jesuth
Hello AG and Lita-Chan!
Before I delve into this week's topic, I wanted to thank you for an entertaining weekly read about one of my favorite subjects.
What is it about video games that attract freaks? That is an excellent question. Having gamed for the better part of the past fifteen years, I've certainly seen my share, as I'm sure everyone who's gamed for a while has. The best example I can give is the very first time I ever gamed, the GM disliked one of the players who showed up that night. About halfway through the campaign Player-Guy pissed off the GM (he was a rogue and was stealing from another character, with an evil alignment, go figure) and the GM killed his character with a thunderbolt from the players God. (?????) The player objected, and the GM started SCREAMING at him. Obviously a freak with a power/control problem. :) Needless to say, I never played in that group again.
But what attracts freaks to video games? After long and hard thought by myself and my husband/gaming buddy and I decided that it's the same thing that attracts freaks to religion/animal rights/right to life groups and just about anything else that has a "fan base." Religious freaks go around condemning you to hell and claiming that only THEY know the true word. Or bombing clinics or feeling they have the right to ruin the property of others, by spray painting fur coats.
*SPOILER ALERT* These are people who want power, and have no outside life, so their crusade to show others "the light" becomes an all encompassing desire. Soon they're trolling message boards every five minutes to prove that AERIS IS NOT DEAD SHE LIKE OPENED HER EYES AT THE END AND EVERYTHING!!!!!11111
Anyways, that's my take on it. Feel free to edit for length and stuff :)
Sailor Amalthea, you don't live near me, do you? Your GM sounds so much like one of my later GM's that it's spooky. Spooky, and a little depressing that there should be two such people in the world.
And maybe it's just premature dementia setting in on me, but your reference to fanboys and religious fanatics bring to mind the image of a clean-cut young man knocking on my front door saying "Excuse me, ma'am, but do you have a moment to speak to me about the clear and present evidence that Aerith survived to the end of FFVII? What? You think she's dead?! Burn, heathen! Burn in Hell I say! Until you accept the truth you can never have salvation! And her name's not Aeris! It's Aerith, because that's the correct Japanese translation, I don't care what they American version of the game says!!" Then he'd leave me a copy of his fanfic where he and Aerith have 15 kids and she dies in childbirth but not before she nobly asks Tifa to "look after" her dearest love, Gary Stu. Which would lead me to do some worshipping of my own. At the alter of the Great Porcelain God in the Temple of Loo.
I have to say, that's an incredibly apt comparison. Beside the highly amusing scenario AG thought up, it really works. Just like gaming, religion has a lot of perfectly normal followers who don't freak you out simply because of their choice of worship. Your average Protestant Christian, for example, is not a Bible-thumping, fire-and-brimstone-preaching psycho. But the incredibly fanatic people make all the normal ones look really bad, because they are THAT DEVOTED. Leaving us normal people scratching our heads and wondering, "What the fuck would possess anyone to act like that?"
In short, every annoying person on the planet is probably a fanperson of one type or another. It explains a lot.
Well, kids, this week's installment of the mailbag certainly has been educational. We figured this fanboy topic was a bit too much for just one week, so next week's topic is an extension of sorts of this week's. We know there are all kinds of weirdo videogame fanboys out there. We know that fanboys and non-fanboys alike spend many, many hours and days of their lifetimes in front of the TV, controller in hand. But WHY? What is it about videogames that is so alluring to you? Do you play them for the sheer fun of it? Is it the challenge of a good platformer, or the intriguing story of a good RPG? Auron aside, what in the hell made us shell out $50 just to role-play TIDUS for 60+ hours? Obviously, we're not looking for one universal answer. We want to know what keeps YOU playing a game until the end. Share your thoughts with us by Tuesday, October 15.
Write in for next week! The power is YOURS!
- AG and Lita-chan