"As Twink runs past an opening in the central webbing, a GIANT MOTHERFUCKING SKULL SPIDER DROPS DOWN RIGHT IN HIS FACE. Seriously. Its body is bigger than Twink. It drops down from the God damn ceiling. Twink will never sleep again. For chrissakes, he doesn't have a door on his house or glass in his windows. WHAT IF ONE OF THESE SPIDERS GETS IN?!?!?!?! Ugh. His scream would echo all through Hyrule."
Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time Part 1
Sam drew the short straw and ended up with the worst dungeon in the history of Zelda dungeons and perhaps all video game dungeons: the Water Temple. And if you think it was bad for Sam, just wait until you see what Twink has to endure.
I’ve been working on Cockarina of Time Part 5 for months, and I am so happy it’s finally done. Twink is less happy, as he finds out what might have happened to him while he was in a coma. Poor, poor Twink.
From the site's title, you should pretty much be able to figure out what we do. Okay, fine, I'll spell it out for you -- we recap the plots of various video games, using sarcasm as well as a slew of penis jokes.
And now we're blogging, too! You can hardly contain your excitement. I suggest you do so anyway. We don't need to see that shit.
If you prefer your humor clean and respectful, this probably isn't the place for you. If you are a teenage boy who can't stand to see people on the internet call your favorite game characters homosexual, this probably isn't the place for you. If you expect your humor to be tailored to your specific tastes, this probably isn't the place for you. All angry e-mails will be mocked.
We have registration open to the general public, so we'd love to hear from you. That is, unless you are one of those people who's just showing up to make things unpleasant for us. Then, you'll be deleted and your posts will be mocked.