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"The old pedo mason, who is IN NO WAY connected to Bonnie and Clydesdale, replies 'Hmm...who exactly is it that's chasing you now, little girl?', probably thinking about chasing Miss Piggy's ass himself. Miss Piggy somehow has to think about his question for a while, despite having been hounded by B&C for the better part of an hour, and adopts a thoughtful, stare-at-the-ceiling expression before stammering tentatively 'Ummm.........someone named...[Bonnie] and...[Clydesdale], yeah, that's it...' Good grief, if she uses any more periods we'll be here all day. I'm sure 2000 of the 3000-odd words in this recap so far consist of '...........'."
     -Ben, Breath of Fire III Part 4

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Posts Tagged ‘gyakuten kenji’


Random obligatory post title

It seems that time has gotten away from me again. It’s not that I’ve forgotten about you guys, it’s just that…well, okay, I’ll confess: I haven’t been playing many games lately. I know! I feel so dirty. But it’s true. Although my game backlog is longer than the list of plotholes in Final Fantasy X-2, I’ve been occupying my time with other hobbies. And class. And work.

There is one game that I’ve been chipping away at every so often for the last…I don’t know…two or three years, and that’s Harvest Moon: Back to Nature. I am determined to beat this game sometime in my life span, even though it is obnoxiously long and repetitive. Don’t get me wrong — it’s completely addictive. But each in-game day takes me an average of 15 minutes of real time to complete. There are 30 days per season, four seasons per year, and three years necessary to “beat” the game. That’s something like 90 hours of real time if my math is correct. Compared to the number of hours I’ve spent in Oblivion it isn’t much, but that doesn’t mean it’s not daunting and kind of pathetic.

I’m sure I could think up a host of sordid backstories for the Harvest Moon cast to entertain you guys, but I hope you’ll forgive me if I don’t put in the effort. The silent farmer “hero” has less personality than the entire cast of Chrono Cross put together. Of course, he did manage to marry and knock up the town alcoholic — who looks like she’s twelve — without sleeping in the same bed as her, so maybe I’ve misjudged him.

The other “news” item which I must mention is, naturally, Gyakuten Kenji. Or Gaykuten Kenji, if you want to keep the VGR naming scheme consistent. This title roughly translates to “Gay-Ass Prosecutor” and you apparently get to play as Miles Edgeworth. So it seems that there are guilty defendants in the Phoenix Wright universe. Who knew? More importantly, since Gumshoe appears to be the sidekick, we will likely be treated to many awkward moments of unrequited gay lust and hero worship. And what better recapping fodder is there?

Also, just to create some discussion — what other fuchsia items will we discover that Edgeworth owns? So far, there are his outfits, his entire office, his knife, his pink DS, his pink apron, and I think I saw something somewhere with a fuchsia bejeweled address book, although that may have been fanart (not that it would be any less accurate). Any guesses what we’ll find out that will make Edgeworth even gayer?

Posted by Jeanne at 10:42

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