Videogame Recaps
Recaps FAQs Extras Mailbag Forum Contact Links

 Most recent recaps:

-Suikoden IV
   /Part 7 :: [09.27.14]
-Suikoden IV
   /Part 6 :: [09.27.14]
-Suikoden III
   /Part 13 :: [08.06.14]
-Suikoden II
   /Part 17 :: [06.14.14]
-Kingdom Hearts
   /Part 16 :: [04.27.14]



  -Jobs
  -Store o' Goodies
  -LiveJournal Community
  -VGR Radio
  -VGR: The Comic
  -Disclaimer
  -Site History
  -Site Map


 Past contests:
  -Durandal Poetry Contest
  -Wankese 101 Contest


"In a bar in the basement of one of the buildings, Bitch finds Rude, along with some other random guys, getting shitfaced around a table. By the admission of one of them, they're too far gone to bother staggering up the stairs to watch all the exciting shit going on outside. Man, I never thought I'd be so jealous of an NPC."
     -Jeanne, Final Fantasy VII Part 10




Absoludicrous.net
Alterra



Link to VGR!


05.29.14

YOU GUYS.

If you haven’t taken a moment today to read about the greatest wedding in history, please do so. I’ve had an epiphany.

Consider the following facts of the Kimye union:

- The venue was the Forte di Belvedere, an elegant “castle” that is, in reality, a military fortification.

- The wedding was presided over by black marble naked man statues.

- One major stumbling block for the wedding was a spotlight shining on a woman’s crotch.

And MOST IMPORTANTLY:

- The dinner table was a slab of marble with names engraved onto it, many of them misspelled.

There’s just no way around it. Kanye and Kim had a Suikoden-themed wedding.

#blessed

#blessedunion #nowitsart

Tags: , ,

Posted by Sam

9 Responses to “YOU GUYS.”

  1. Accidentally The Sun Says:

    It can’t be a Suikoden-themed wedding, it was a straight couple getting married.

  2. Cat Says:

    I don’t know who those people are but… Joybunnies for them, I guess. Mazel Tov.

  3. Sam Says:

    It can’t be a Suikoden-themed wedding, it was a straight couple getting married.

    Yeah, except:

    Also two hours before the wedding, Kanye decided he didn’t need the 80 moving lights that he had ordered installed to light the dance floor and the party, declaring, “I’m in the center of this party, and I’m the only one people need to see. The rest of these people don’t need lights on them.”

    Kanye then gave a 45-minute toast to himself.

    Kim was pretty incidental to these proceedings. Kanye would have married a mirror if they’d let him.

  4. demidaemon Says:

    All of this is hilarious to me, especially the picture.

    But, If Kanye is Jowy and Kim is Jillia (which makes a weird kind of sense), then does Kanye have a slice on the side who is his best friend from days past that he left for his non-entity of a woman? Let’s take this metaphor to its most obvious conclusion. ;)

  5. demidaemon Says:

    Also, this makes me want to have a Suikoden themed wedding!

  6. Sam Says:

    I was gonna say Jay-Z is Barry in this scenario, but I don’t know who would be Beyonce. Nanami? I’m going with Nanami. Fuck it.

    The only other thing Jeanne and I determined was that Sasarai would be the Jaden Smith stand-in running around in a white Batman costume.

  7. Jeanne Says:

    Also, the minimalist sound system would be Annallee’s silent “singing.”

    I shouldn’t have to say this, but obviously the golden toilet tower is shaped like a penis.

  8. demidaemon Says:

    I am rolling on the floor over this!

  9. TsuNoBa Says:

    That revelation totally makes up for the terrible, indescribable feelings I got while reading that article.

    And since it’s difficult to tell someone’s tone of voice over the internet, I will clarify that I am completely serious. That article horrified me, but the epiphany made it all better.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.


Recaps ::FAQs ::Extras ::Mailbag ::Forum ::Contact ::Links